More and more of what I do is about avoiding fear
You choose a shop with fewer people. You give up a trip because you do not know how you will cope with the journey. You put off a call although the matter needs attention. Cancelling your plans brings relief.
After a while, a similar situation appears again. Once again, you mainly think about how to avoid tension.
Anxiety itself does not mean a disorder. It can appear before an important meeting, examination or life change. A problem begins when it persists, is very intense or increasingly determines what you do.
This is not always visible from the outside. You still work and meet people. Only you know how much preparation going out requires and how many things you give up.
Avoidance brings relief for a while. It does not necessarily reduce fear before the next attempt. Returning to situations you have avoided for a long time becomes harder.
Notice the reason for your decisions. Do you prefer a quieter shop, or are you afraid to enter another? Do you not feel like meeting someone, or do you want to go but fear your reaction?
These are not questions you need to answer immediately. They help you examine how anxiety affects your life.
If you increasingly give up important matters, it is worth seeking help. During a consultation, I ask what you fear, what happens in particular situations and what you do to feel safer.
Medical assessment is also important when physical symptoms are present. We should not assume that every episode of palpitations or dizziness is caused by anxiety.
Working on anxiety does not mean telling you, “Just do it.” First, we need to understand the difficulty and choose appropriate support. You do not have to work out how to deal with it on your own.
Hanna Swierczewska
Psychologist, psychotraumatologist, psycho-oncologist
If you would like to talk about your situation, you are welcome to book an online consultation.
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